denyce: (DA: Alec/Logan)
[personal profile] denyce
Masterpost
Previous parts: 1, 2



“Logan, Logan…” Logan recognized the panic-filled voice but couldn’t place the name or face. “Come on, open your eyes. Come on. Come on, you can do it.”

Logan didn’t want to, the pain was too great, but their plea was so desperate. Slowly despite the pain coursing through his body, Logan opened his eyes to mere slits, just enough to see Asha bent over him.

“Thank God! You’re going to be ok…. We just need to stop the bleeding…” To make her point her hand pressed harder into his side. He couldn’t suppress the moan of pain the pressure induced.

“I’m sorry. We’re gonna get you help. You and Cindy.” At Cindy’s name, Logan tried to move, ignoring the pain that flared as he tried to shift around. “No, don’t move! She’s okay, or will be. Joshua!” she yelled.

Confused, Logan struggled through the pain, but in spite of his efforts he barely moved enough to see around Asha. “He’s awake,” Asha continued, her voice lower. Although he couldn’t see him, Logan realized Joshua had to be standing close. “We’ve got to get them to the hospital.”

“No hospitals,” someone interrupted. Logan knew that voice… Lydecker. But Lydecker was dead. There was no way he survived that car crash a year ago, even if his body had been missing when they pulled the car out.

Logan would have gasped if he had the breath to do so when Lydecker moved into his field of vision - the man he knew was gone. Chronologically, Lydecker wasn’t that old - he’d only been in his late forties or early fifties and he been militarily fit but the man staring down at him was old and using a cane. His hair was stark white and his face scarred nearly beyond recognition. Only his gravelly voice was recognizable. “We can’t afford to draw any more attention,” Lydecker continued. “We’ll have to get them back inside Terminal City. Bring a Doctor to them.”

Logan blinked, fighting against the immobilizing pain. Suddenly Logan felt an undercurrent to his pain, and it had nothing to do with the gunshot wound he was profusely bleeding from, and more to do with Alec - pain increasing at the thought of Alec.

Asha interjected, “Are you crazy? We can’t move them.”

“Secure the front – we’re leaving in sixty-seconds.” Logan glanced up, his eyes widening as he saw the figure coming up behind Lydecker. It was Zack and he was carrying Max in his arms. “Get me some clothes for all three,” Zack continued to snap out orders, “and something to dress his wound.”

Seeing Max caused a dreaded ache - he needed Alec now. In desperation, he lifted himself up to see behind Zack. Ignoring the dizziness that swept through his body he tried to lift even further - to see if he was making a wrong assumption, that Alec was there, would walk through the door. Logan’s heart pounded, scrambling for that connection he had with Alec- it wasn’t there. Swallowing against his building fear, Logan didn’t care as long as Alec was safe. His hope deflated when he saw that no one was behind Zack. Zack walked directly over to the couch. Laying Max’s unconscious body down gently.

Exhausted, Logan dropped back to the floor, holding his breath as Zack’s eyes turned toward him. He waited to see if Zack would remember and attack him to finish the job he had started the last time they met. Zack’s eyes shifted over to Asha, and didn’t sugar coat it as he told her. “No choice. Go and bring back a friendly - Carr, or Shankar. Bring them to the safe house north of Terminal City.” After a moment, he added curtly, “I’ll do what I can to keep him alive. You want him to live, go now!”

Logan waited, fully expecting to hear an earful from Asha. As he had discovered long ago, Asha wasn’t the type to just stand there and be intimidated or just take orders. Logan was surprised when Asha just glared then shook it off as she turned her attention back to him. Her lips thinned stretching into a line that somehow was meant to be a facsimile of a smile. It didn’t matter - Logan could see the stress line her throat as she picked up his hand and spoke, “Here, need you to hold this down.” Her hand pressed down over his, pain searing through his at the touch but he maintained the pressure Asha wanted. “Good - just hold that down until he dresses you. I’ll be back as quickly as I can,” then tried to add weight to the resolution by demanding, “you just hang on!” She squeezed his free hand and stood. Before she turned away, Logan understood her fear the urgency as he saw the front of her shirt covered in blood - his blood. For the first time Logan suspecting the real seriousness of his condition.

Zack pointed toward someone and said, “You - go with her.”

Logan heard the muffled sounds of them leaving, then someone else coming back into the room. “Sir?”

Dazed, Logan just lay there while everyone else around him moved about. It was surreal, like watching a silent movie, only eerie and in color. After Zack finished dressing Max he glanced down at Logan. He noted that Zack looked the same - with the partial metal plate, his red-eye flashing.

Zack squatted down, his face stoic, his voice flat matching his demeanor as he spoke.

“I remember everything - before and after.” Pushing Logan’s hand away he examined the wound. He ripped material effortlessly, quickly dressing the wound. Once Zack had finished, he dressed Logan by putting on a pair of sweats over his naked body. Abruptly Zack stood, turning and saying “Let’s go. Joshua take Logan. He needs to be carried with as little movement as possible. ”

Zack walked back to the couch, picking up Max. Suddenly his view was blocked by Joshua’s large frame. “We go now.” Joshua bent down and gingerly picked him up. As careful as Joshua was, the jostling movements left him sweating profusely, pain shooting through his whole body. Opening his eyes which he hadn’t realized he had closed, Logan looked up into Joshua’s face. He watched his nose twitch then heard Joshua’s whispered, “Alec …”

It wasn’t exactly a question or a statement, and Logan wasn’t sure what Joshua wanted for an answer. In the end he just nodded, said, “Alec,” and allowed Joshua to collect whatever data he could with his specialized canine DNA. Logan watched as Joshua’s inhaled deeper before he nodded as if he’d gotten all the answers he needed. Then he turned swiftly to follow the others. Logan lasted only minutes before he passed out, still cradled gently within Joshua’s arms.


*~*~*~

Alec woke slowly. Feeling dizzy, confused and lost, he tried to swallow against his parched throat.

Down the corridor outside his door, Alec heard the sharp click of heels coming closer. They hammered hard against the tile, growing louder as the distance decreased. Cold dread filled his stomach when the steps slowed as they neared his room, coming to a full stop right outside his door.

His adrenaline spiked as his fear increased. It had to be Renfro. He strained against the straps holding him down, desperate to turn his head toward the door. Kept helplessly immobile, only his eyes were able to move in that direction. The knob turned and the door was unceremoniously pushed open.

His peripheral vision caught only the shadowed silhouette through the curtain but it was enough. Renfro, as predicted.

She paused for a moment in the entryway, letting the anticipation build - before she moved forward and drew the curtain aside.

It was Renfro… but then it wasn’t. The image shifted and merged into someone else - it was the woman from the van. Alec could feel her heated glare as it traveled down his stretched out body. He was forcibly held, strapped down in restraints with a bit shoved into his mouth like an animal. All he could do was stare up at her imploringly.

The image shifted again and it was Renfro who stood staring down at him, blatantly ignoring his pleading look. Her gaze wandered over his naked body - fear increased his adrenaline. A young man was standing quietly behind Renfro. His handler, his jumbled brain supplied. He didn’t remember the man walking in. Confused Alec tried to shake his head. Renfro and the handler were gone and standing in Renfro’s place was the redhead from the van.

“494, or do you prefer Alec?” The question sounded oddly sincere even though she knew he couldn’t answer. She nodded and smiled, like he had responded. Her voice was bright and cheerful, as if they were going to be close friends. “It’s a pleasure, Alec.” Her hand pressed against her chest, offering a sincere apology. “You’ll have to forgive my faux pas earlier; I thought you were the wrong X5, just a bothersome gnat.” Her eyes narrowed and then glimmered with sheer joy at whatever she saw within his eyes. “Although,” shrugging “admittedly you could be useful as bait,” she paused then added, “or parts. It’s why I kept you alive.” She sighed dramatically, “We knew about you. You were just a means to an end in order to achieve 452, who, as you might have guessed, was our original target.” Abruptly she leaned over him and tenderly caressed the side of his face with the back of her hand. Sheer terror surged through his body and Alec’s jaw clamped down painfully on the bit. “Imagine my surprise to discover I had who I wanted - that it was you, Alec.”

Suddenly unexpected pain coursed through him, cutting through his fear until Alec’s body arched spasming at the waves of pain; straining against his restraints. “Shh, it’s alright… Just ride it through.” She continued to coo gentle sentiments, her hands petting his body as he continued to convulse. “You’re doing good, shush. So good! The sequence has progressed further than I would have thought. The fragrance you’re emitting…” She inhaled deeply and practically purred, “it’s intoxicating.”

The look in his eyes must have shown his true fear. “No, no, no. Shush,” She said soothingly. “Don’t worry. You’re just experiencing…” she paused to search for the right words then smiled when she did, her voice lifting in excitement, “growing pains.” Pulling up a stool she sat down at his side, her eyes glinting in pleasure as they swept over his body. “Your body is changing, becoming what it was meant to be. You’re already in the final stages.

“It’s so exciting. I wouldn’t have predicted… Not when the initial changes were forced into hibernation. Those changes to your DNA were made so long ago.” Absently the tip of her fingernail trailed down his body. “It wasn’t her fault, you know. Elizabeth was ordered to abandon project X – you.” Suddenly over-sensitive to the wrongness of her, Alec’s stomach muscles quivered in an attempt to escape her touch. “Elizabeth followed her orders and found 452, found your Max.” The straps were starting to cut into his skin, but he couldn’t stop pulling against them, couldn’t stop the desperate hope that something might give.

“Of course, it cost her her own life.” The redhead pulled away, sadness and loss unmistakable in her face and voice. She had loved this Elizabeth. Alec anxiously tried to think, to search his memory for any Elizabeth. He couldn’t think of a single one until it suddenly hit him - Renfro, Dr. Elizabeth Renfro.

He must have made some kind of sound because the redhead looked down to meet his accusatory glance. She smiled when she understood that he realized whom she had been referring to. “Yes, Dr. Renfro, my Elizabeth.” Her hands cupped Alec’s face, the gleam in her eyes sparkling with adoration for a coveted prize. “And you, Alec, were one of her greatest projects.” He wanted to glare, clamp his fingers around her neck and squeeze, to watch the life - that light in her eyes, slowly go out. She must have read the expression on his face because she leaned in close enough that he could smell a sour rank on her breath. “And you’re mine.”

The bit was pushed too deep, forcibly held in place so that Alec’s screams went unheeded, his words internal fighting to get out, “No! You fucking crazy Manticore bitch”

He had no voice but she understood. Consumed with hate, Alec watched her pull back and sit up. He saw her arm lift to do something behind his head before she gave an order to someone who had been there in the room with them. “Add 10 cc’s more, every half hour. I want to accelerate his changes. Call me as soon as you detect any physical evidence.” Whatever the 10 cc were, Alec felt the difference immediately as the pain increased and ricocheted throughout his body. All of his senses were suddenly overloaded and one by one started to shut down, leaving him feeling muted and helpless in a cocoon of white noise. He felt himself falling, slipping into a memory that he had been programmed to forget.

Slipping into a memory, Alec opened his eyes and found himself staring up at Renfro. “Hmm, and this is…” Behind her, Alec could hear his handler fidget nervously with his clipboard. Not that he was surprised; the man was human, young, and obviously lacking in experience dealing with someone like Renfro.

His handler shuffled closer, nervously clearing his throat before finally answering, “X5 494, Ma’am.” Alec watched as the clipboard that held his medical records was meekly passed over his body into Renfro’s hands.

She took it but didn’t even bother looking at it before asking, “493’s twin, or clone?”

Startled by her cold mechanical response, his handler apprehensively stammered back, “Yes Ma’am.”

Renfro moved idly toward the end of his bed, glancing back and forth between his medical pages and the machines to his left. His handler followed a half a step behind but faltered when she came to an abrupt stop; her voice sharp with annoyance, she demanded, “Which is it? Clone or twin?”

Alec’s eyes followed as his handler ducked his head causing his hair to fall into his eyes. He silently nodded before nervously mumbling, “Twin.” Somewhat surprised, Alec realized his handler was nothing more than a boy. His eyes shifted down his own body, belatedly realizing how young he was. This seeing Renfro, seeing his handler, it wasn’t real. Somehow he knew that he wasn’t supposed to remember this, but he was and it was playing out like some kind of virtual game.

As the memory played out Alec felt his body, his mind, his thoughts open –remembering, feeling experiencing the memory as it happened when he was designated X5-494.

Though his handler easily towered over Renfro by more than a foot, the boy was folded in on himself until he somehow looked smaller, his tall frame crouched and ready to run if given the chance.

Disregarding his obvious distress Renfro asked, “How many deposits today?”

494 would have rolled his eyes if he could, seeing the boy easily glance down over her shoulder at the pages she was flipping through before meekly repeating, “How many deposits today?” like he hadn’t heard her the first time.

Not that 494 couldn’t see why his handler was confused. Renfro excelled at intimidation. She never made it easy. The information was clearly marked on the previous page. One they both had just watched her scan through before she flipped onto the next page. Showing his nerves, the handler answered, “His third, Ma’am.”

Renfro’s lips lifted into a blatant leer. 494 flushed, clenching down on his bit. Thankfully, they were deliberately ignoring him, making it easy to watch their exchange. His eyes quickly scanned the room, one he knew he had been in dozens of times. He was naked, securely shackled to the exam table. Wires and probes… he glanced down at his cock, shocked to find himself forced erect with a cockring. Alec frantically searched his memories, but he couldn’t remember anything about why this was happening.

Helpless, he could only to let the memory play out.

Obviously, she was here for some other reason than asking questions that could be answered by looking at his chart; otherwise she’d be dealing with Hamish, not Hamish’s assistant – 494’s glorified handler.

Huh, and what exactly is 494’s potential daily deposit?”

“Five, Ma’am.”

“Hmm, that’s all? I would have thought the number would be higher for an X5?”

“Yes Ma’am.”

“That was a question, I expect an answer—you are his handler, correct?”

“Yes Ma’am, I am… I just thought you’d prefer to confer with Dr. Hamish… I could go…”

“If I wanted to discuss this with Dr. Hamish, I would have,” she interrupted him, impatience suddenly flaring. “Now if you are trying to tell me that you’re not actually familiar with this case—I can rectify that…” The threat was clear in her voice.

“No, Ma’am, I mean yes… Yes, I am familiar with this case.”

“Good. Now, please explain why it is deemed acceptable that 494’s daily sperm deposit is lower than average compared to other X5s.”

“In 494’s case, it’s been lowered to produce the optimum higher potency of sperm. Officially, 494 is still considered a risk. It was suggested that the number of 494’s ejaculations for cloning and breeding be reduced, so as to not repeat 493’s unexpected problems.”

She raised an eyebrow when he paused, and he nervously added, “Initially 494 and the other clones were tagged for additional genetic testing, to study the flawed coding. Each counterpart of the original twelve were heavily monitored and thoroughly tested. Our tests show that 493’s defects appear to be an isolated incident.”

Renfro snickered, “Isolated incident?”

The handler flushed, “Yes Ma’am, according to the data that has been made available.”

“So your conclusions are based on tests that do not include any data from 493?”

“Yes, Ma’am. As Dr. Hamish outlined in his report, it was discovered that reducing the amount of 494’s ejaculations yields a higher potency sperm. Dr. Hamish is recommending that at the end of this study 494 be returned to his full status and be cleared for active duty. Until then, 494 presents a unique research opportunity. Doctor Hamish also proposes, at least for the time being, that 494 be suspended from the breeding program to remain here for a new study. If you’d like, I can go get a copy of Dr Hamish’s proposal?”

At her snort, the handler lowered his head. This time even the heavy fringe of hair did nothing to hide his handler’s blush as he belatedly realized what he had implied. It was ridiculous to think that Renfro wouldn’t have read Dr. Hamish’s proposal long before he ever had the chance to lay his eyes on it. 494 watched his handler’s eyes widen with the dawning realization that she was testing him, though he was turned so that Renfro couldn’t see. His handler’s posture slowly straighten as he covertly tried to veil the naivety of his thoughts. 494 would have smirked if he could have.

“No, that won’t be necessary,” she replied condescendingly. “So explain to me what all this is designed to study.”

Renfro was standing close to the handler, crowding him, and sweat was beading on his forehead. He swallowed nervously but continued, “494 consistently produces a higher-potency sperm than other males in the series. Pursuing an explanation for this anomaly, two critical differences have been documented. 494 is unique in that the twinning was natural and unintended rather than a deliberate part of the cloning process. Furthermore, he has had no direct human contact at any point in his development. Dr. Hamish feels that these two qualities isolate 494 from the other males in the series: he wants to continue to collect, study, store, and rate the potency of his sperm samples.”

Renfro nodded, her eyes roaming over his naked body. She smirked and leaned down, addressing 494 as if he hadn’t just heard the entire conversation. “Hmm, did you hear that, 494? Means you actually might be useful. Guess that makes you the ‘good’ twin.”

She reached out slowly, her finger nearly touching 494’s swollen erect cock before her hand was forcefully smacked away.

She turned and glared at the handler.

Again he flushed, but held his ground as he mumbled out, “Sorry Madame, but if you touch him you’ll contaminate him and damage the procedure.” He twisted around and grabbed a bottle. “You need to use this.” He squeezed out some of the liquid into his hands before thrusting the bottle at her. “Squeeze out enough to generously coat your hands. Use it as you’d use hand lotion. It’s silicone-based, and acts like gloves without any of the cumbersome weight or ill effects to your dexterity. It effectively protects the subject…” He put the bottle down before adding belatedly, “Completely harmless, averages between two and four hours of protection before it wears off.”

Cautiously she followed his lead and coated her hands. This time when she leaned in she reached out and dug her nail into 494’s hip, scraping at the skin before trailing over toward his cock. She let her finger linger there, barely touching with the tip of her nail. Both distracted and amused, she ignored his sharp gasp. “And this?” he felt her finger trail more firmly around the wide metal band wrapped around the base of 494’s cock. “A cock ring?” The weight of her finger left the band as he watched her head incline. Her eyes following the same direction of the wires his handler had attached to a machine on the other side of the bed.

A moment later 494 locked eyes with hers with a combative heated glared, his teeth grinding into the bit. He hated her touching him, hated that he was her lab rat. She had called him the good twin and that might be the case, but he was here, strapped down and helpless, while his damaged bad twin was out there somewhere—free.

It was obvious before his handler avoided his gaze that he was too scared to acknowledge 494’s distress in front of Renfro. Swallowing he continued on, “Of sorts. A small electrical pulse is emitted to help 494 achieve and maintain his erection in between ejaculations. It allows us to monitor him physically and collects statistics to compare with other X5s. It also calculates wait times between ejaculations in order to get the strongest possible deposits, and allows us time to prepare.”

“Prepare?” She asked looking perplexed.

“Yes. We have to make adjustments and calculate variances for each deposit. Under the new program, each deposit will be frozen to activate at a later date. This will allow us ample time to conduct a controlled study of an X5 during optimum breeding years.”

Renfro didn’t take her eyes off of 494, but shook her head, clearly confused. “What’s the purpose? You have ample X5s at your disposal, what makes 494 so special?”

494 wanted to know that too, and shifted his eyes to his handler.

Clearly intimidated, his body wilted under Renfro’s scrutiny. “First off, as I mentioned before, 494 is not a clone but a true twin—one of the very few we have. The others, 453 included, were actually genetically created, cloned. Second, as you know, it was his twin, 493 that was among Colonel Lydecker’s twelve—only four of their clones survived psy-ops, plus 494, of course. At this point, 494 isn’t contaminated. He has been isolated since the original twelve escaped—meaning 494 is a perfectly clean specimen.”

“Interesting. She pointed toward the cock ring, “So I take it that through this you’ll indefinitely control his erections and the deposits? Even after he’s returned to duty?”

494’s eyes widened in fear and he closed his eyes, dreading the answer.

“Yes, once the project has been approved.”

494 wanted to yell and lash out at them, wanted to make them see him, but there was nothing he could do. A piece of his soul splintered as his handler absentmindedly put a hand on his forehead to calm him as if he was no more than an animal.

Curious she asked, “How do you expect 494 to remain clean once he’s returned to active duty?” Then scoffed in annoyance, as she continued talking. “He’s still male, and, what, fifteen? If the world hasn’t changed, even an average human male is nothing more than a walking erection at that age.”

“True,” the handler’s head bobbed, pointing, “Though if you’d take a closer look...” With a firm, gentle touch the handler gripped 494’s cock, pulling the skin further back. The pad of the man’s finger trailed lightly over his skin, just under the metal band that circled the base of his cock, where 494 felt his finger trail down toward his sacs. The shiver of sensation was disquieting, and 494 instinctively jerked against his restraints. Once again, the handler ignored his response. “This, do you see?”

“Yes, and?”

“Once it is approved, these will no longer be needed…” his finger delicately brushed 494’s inner thigh. “Instead, a flexible nero-pulse will be surgically implanted. The implant will control all of 494’s sexual responses, and we’ll control the implant indefinitely.”

494 stiffened and jerked bodily against his restraints, his breathing overtly heavy as fear sliced through him. His handler absently reached out and started to purposely pet him down his flank, silently ordering him to calm down.

494 got the message loud and clear to shut the fuck up—it’s not like there was anything he could do to change his treatment and it was foolish to let Renfro see his fear. But what they were so calmly proposing was…. His handler’s large hand continued to stroke him, and he struggled to relax and stand down, struggled to do exactly what his handler wanted. Moments later his body had calmed under his handler’s strong hand.

494 wanted to turn away when he saw Renfro’s eyes glitter as she stared down, taking in his reaction. Her mouth quirked as their eyes connected. Nodding, she smiled at his immediate response to his handler’s touch. “Interesting,” she purred. And with that, 494 knew that the interrogation Renfro had given his handler had nothing to do with clarifying the physical aspects of the proposed project, but rather, everything to do with observing their interaction, and his response to his handler.

Renfro’s chin suddenly tilted up, her eyes bearing down into his - he didn’t look away when she asked, “But once 494 is cleared, all his other tests indicate he’s a prime candidate for the breeding program. Though I agree test tubes are normally efficient and less messy, the successful birth rates of female X5s are sufficiently lower. As you know, due to their feline DNA, it’s nearly impossible to impregnate a female unless she’s in heat — yet you’re suggesting they permanently shelve 494?”

His handler shook his head in denial. “Not permanently Ma’am. In a few months 494 will reach his sixteenth year when most X5s start tomcatting. Currently we have four groups slated to train male X5s to sexually interact with each other, before they enter into the breeding program, in order to heighten their prowess before they are introduced and matched with a female in heat. We only propose that 494 remain essentially virginal, isolated from those groups and the breeding program, for the next 3-4 years. We will happily return him to the breeding program afterwards.”

She snorted, “Virginal?”

He nodded, “Of any unprotected contaminated DNA - skin contact.”

“And the implant?”

The abrupt sound of beeping interrupted the discussion.

494 already knew what the alarm indicated. He had felt the rapid incline of build up since his handler’s touch. Panic hit as he couldn’t control his body; he didn’t want to do this with Renfro watching. Frantically 494 struggled against his restraints under his escalating fear and anger.

Relieved, his handler smiled and shushed him, patting him reassuringly before moving to shut the alarm off.

494 watched helplessly as his handler moved toward another machine and keyboard to start typing. He pushed several buttons before returning to the exam table. Overtly pleased, his handler stated, “This is good. Nice timing, 494, now you can show Dr. Renfro just how special you are.”

He glared at his handler and released a low growl from the back of his throat, but he knew nothing was going to stop this or get Renfro to leave. Quickly and with practiced efficiency the handler rolled what appeared to be thin latex over the head of 494’s cock, but unlike a condom it only wrapped tightly over the head. “This sponge cap,” the handler’s thumb swiped over the tip, “is new. It’s specially designed to absorb and hold all of 494’s sperm. It was created to allow for easier testing and handling instead of having to deal with actual fluid.” His fingers moved down 494’s heavy cock and started to slowly stroke the swollen member. Sharp muffled moans escaped from the enforced bit jammed in 494’s mouth, and once again he moved jerkily against his restraints, but this time he wasn’t reprimanded - this time it was encouraged.

“These wires here?” the handler continued, one hand fisting 494’s cock while the fingers of his other hand slid just under the wires, lifting them high enough that Renfro could see. “They read 494’s internal data and send out emitted hyper pulses that further stimulate him a rhythm that’s been enhanced based on previous data. The program continuously adjusts to keep 494 stimulated in order to procure an optimum ejaculated sample.” The handler let the wires go and dropped his hand below Renfro’s view to rub over 494’s inner thigh. The handler’s added pressure matched the increasing rhythm as he encouragingly stroked 494, building up to the crescendo. “A signal indicates when 494 has accomplished a full sample and is ready for final collection. At that point stimulation increases and then allows the ring to expand to ease extraction. It’s all very precise.”

Throughout the narration, his handler’s hands continued to actively stroke and caress his inner thighs. He trembled, his body pulling desperately against the restraints, although this time it wasn’t to get away. The stimulus drove his body and his need was too great: he wanted the touch, needed friction. It was obvious that Renfro found the situation entertaining. 494’s muscles tensed, feeling more violated under the scrutiny of her piercing gaze than he ever had by his handler, and he finally caved and closed his eyes.

He didn’t even realize that she’d moved until he felt her hot breath ghosting over his ear. Her voice was soft, encouraging, on the edge of excitement as she ordered, “Open your eyes, 494.”

With reluctance he obeyed, his glare hostile and hiding nothing.

She chuckled, pursing her lips together in a faux pout, tsking at his threatening glare. Her eyes danced, clearly enjoying the show he was providing. He was too vulnerable, unable to hide his emotions, and while he didn’t care about his furious anger, the humiliation colliding with the desperate need to come, shamed him.

Suddenly he felt the slick wetness of his handler’s large hand over his cock, distracting him from Renfro and returning his attention to his more pressing need to come. Biting harder into the bit, he bucked. Already it was routine, almost a comfort, as he felt his handler’s easy, steady pull. The restraints around his hips eased their hold, allowing him a small amount of movement so he could effectively fuck himself within his handler’s hand. Long fingers gripped tighter around his cock, his reward as he lifted off the table, snapping his hips in rhythm. Only this time she was here, looking down at him, grinning manically. Sweat dripped from his brow; he was so close. His handler shifted, forcing Renfro to move down closer to 494’s head and blocking her full view of his handler’s hands.

She bent over him, watching, her hot breath whispering over his neck. Overwrought, the tendons of his neck were popping out as he purposely avoided her gaze. He felt her hand move and land on his skin. She dragged the pads of her fingers over his chest, pausing to flick at a bead of sweat and then swirl it around the heated wet mess that was pouring off his body. Almost absently, she raked her nails down his stomach and then back up to his chest. A sharp tip flicked roughly, scraping across his nipple. His head snapped in her direction, growling, but she only laughed as her nail bit into his skin again, increasing the pressure and digging deeper.

He couldn’t see his handler, but every painful touch, scrape, and hard pinch by Renfro’s hand was countered by his handler’s steady open caresses. His touch ranged from gentle to sexually charged, his hands and fingers silently communicating to 494 that everything would be all right. 494 was surprised, not so much by his handler’s gentleness, because they had done this numerous times already. No, he was surprised because with Renfro here he had thought it’d be like when Hamish was present—impersonal and detached.

Unlike Hamish who just stood to the side and watched. Renfro liked to touch and continued to abuse his nipples, pulling and twisting one nub and then the other. The pain did nothing to decrease 494’s need. If anything it heightened his awareness, and he was thankful his handler didn’t stay passive. Instead he was more demonstrative than usual his fingers inching toward 494’s hole and brushed against his entrance. 494 wanted more but they couldn’t, not with Renfro here.

His need increased and his handler’s hand tightened in response. Grateful, his hips snapped up in double time. He was close, he just needed… He shook his head in denial and his teeth clamped down hard on the bit. He refused to beg, not now, not with her here. Suddenly he felt a shift, then caught a glimpse of his handler behind Renfro. The fringe of bangs did nothing to hide the concern nor the spark of excitement in his handler’s hazel-green eyes. They locked eyes - he wasn’t sure what his handler saw, he only nodded. Neither said a word, but gentle fingers caressed his sac then reached down rub across the periphery of his anus. A nail scraped and dug in toward his hole. He continued staring at the ceiling, knowing that their usual ritual had to stay private. It was a game that was sick and perverted 494 could only be thankful was just between them. He didn’t want her to know.

He welcomed the intrusion and his muscles squeezed hard on the digit, his body arching rigid in mid air, his nostrils flaring. His voice ragged and breaking through the bit, 494 screamed and finally came.

His body still quivering in aftershocks, he barely registered their voices as they spoke above him. He missed more than half of their conversation but he did catch the ending. Apparently his handler was to report any and all activity regarding 494 back to her, regardless of Hamish’s own reported findings. At his handler’s consent to her new orders she turned and leaned down, obviously aware of his consciousness. Her eyes glittered in pleasure and she nodded, smiling her approval as she spoke. “Very good, 494.”

She straightened and walked out of the room, her heels echoing—this time thankfully away from him. He focused on the sound until it dwindled down to silence.

*~*~*~

Pain followed the orgasm, agonizing spasms that ricocheted throughout his body. Alec found himself gasping for air through a sea of misery, the memories too sharp, too vivid; it frightened him to his core.

It was just the beginning, the first wave of reliving a string of memories, one on top of another as the locks cascaded open. He remembered how Hamish relinquished him into Renfro’s charge, trading one lab cage for another. He’d been moved to Renfro’s lab cage, closer to the anomalies, and held prisoner away from his fellow X5’s. She’d forced him to become a test subject of a different nature, made him endure injections that further manipulated his DNA—stretching boundaries that other X5’s hadn’t survived.

He remembered Renfro’s daily visits, how she’d been almost disappointed when she’d find 494 alive – surprised to find that he had survived another night. He could see her standing on the other side of protected glass, watching and waiting patiently until he was restrained once again. His hatred had intensified every time she’d forced him to endure another new series of injections.

Then it had changed, he had survived what no other X5 did - the second series of tests.

You’re progressing well, 494.

The battery of daily injections had continued but when he was worn out, nearly comatose from the treatments, she’d come in and pet him, muttering about how close they were. That he was her prize. That she had them working diligently on the last sequence whatever that meant. He had wanted to pull away, to just crawl into nothingness and just die. Instead he lay there motionless as she’d whisper nonsense, coaxing him into sleep.

By morning she’d be gone and he’d be alone to endure the pain.

Pockets of memory continued to burst in quick secession. He remembered one particular morning months later, she was there in the room waiting for him to wake. Renfro was grim, her anger and frustration clearly etched in her face. It was odd that she was there, even more so that he was strapped down even though he was still too weak to move. He spotted another woman who stood behind Renfro; the image pinged another, recognition hit, he knew her. Another face layered over the memory - it was Mia. Flashes, splintered scenes - Mia moving closer under Renfro’s orders, her telling him to forget – forget the lab, Hamish, his handler, Renfro’s injections.

He got glimpses of Mia, weeks later, in Psy-ops, overseeing aspects of his training, before he was herded back with his fellow X5s, then Mia telling him to hug Logan; Mia telling him it’d be okay for him to remember when the time was right…

The memories fused together to create a complete cohesive picture. He knew the truth now, remembered what Renfro had forced Mia to make him forget. How Renfro had ordered Mia to help him, play catch up, gain skills comparable to those of his fellow X5’s. At some point Renfro made the mistake and left him alone with Mia that allowing Mia to leave triggers to help 494 build a foundation, to compartmentalize the experiences, his emotions. To nurture independence and strength that’d stabilize a core personality beyond his designation, separate from Manticore – from Renfro.

Though he had no tangible memory of Mia, he felt a kinship with her. When he saw her at Jam Pony, he somehow internally recognized her as a familiar face, one he could trust. He felt no sense of danger from her. With everyone else, whether they were connected to Manticore or not, he felt on edge, his awareness heightened. Mia was the opposite - he felt a closeness, that he was safe, and oddly that she cared.

His body continued to spasm, the pain agonizing. But once he stopped fighting against the tide of memories forcing their way through, Alec found an odd peace, a sense of comfort as each memory was revealed, a puzzle finishing creating a full picture.

With his memories intact, Alec felt a sense of strength as they cemented and rooted in place. He acknowledged to himself what he was becoming. He had survived the original experiments with Renfro, and instinctively knew he’d survive these changes.

next~

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January 2017

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